Friday, September 16, 2011

To Heal Or Not to Heal...

I have a sort of blessing/curse thing that happens when I get "involved" with people, men in particular.
What happens is that I soon find myself "seeing" what his difficulties in life are, what is amiss in his energetic field and his karmic history.
I find myself healing these things as that is what I do, and I give it freely, but then it turns into ALL that that person was in my life for and when these things get healed, they have a wake up moment and look at me and realize I am the furthest thing from what they even can stand in a woman and leave me in very hurtful ways.
They seem to come back to me at intervals (quite unwittingly) to get more healing or whatever, and then poof they are gone again after looking at me and telling me how ungodly I am or too this or too that or not worthy of love etc... of course, I have just expended mass amounts of love and light and spiritual yummy goodness into them, so it kind of ruins my warm fuzzies.
I know it is my "job" to help even these people, but just once before I leave this life, I would like to experience someone who is not JUST in need of healing and who would look at me with love and acceptance.
Just once.